I miss you Grandaddy!!!

{turn your volume up} Today marks one year of my grandfathers passing. He was like a father to me. He was such a strong willing man. Words can't express the loss I feel without him. He died 2 months before I gave birth to his 1st Great grand. I was hoping he could hang on just a little while longer, but I new God was calling him home. Home in Heaven, where he would have piece & comfort. He is in such a better place than here on earth. Before my granddad passed away, I would always tell him to stay strong, and call out to God. I told him to pray about his sickness, and God will take him home. I remember his exact words before his death, "Kim, I want to go home, I want to see mamma & daddy & live in peace." I'm crying as I write this. I told him to stay strong, & give his heart to the good Lord & he'll give you peace. The next week or so, I remember he told me he gave his heart to the Lord. Praise God!!! He was now a child of God. I new whenever he passed away he would be in better hands with the Lord. The weekend before Father's Day, that Sunday Wayne & I went to visit Granddaddy. He was in no shape or strength to do much of anything that day. The hospice lady was there, my dad, granny, & step-mom were in the room helping him bandage up his wounds. He had gotten so weak over the past months, and there was nothing anyone could do for him. It was his time & we all new it. That day I didn't really get to speak with him like I wanted to. I kissed him, and told him I loved him & to stay strong. His last words before Wayne & I left was " I will baby", & stared strait into my eyes. Then we left. I couldn't handle seeing my grandfather in such pain. Later that night I received a phone call that he had passed away in the ambulance going to the hospital around 7 something. I broke down in tears. Mind you I was 8 months pregnant with Hunter, witch made me even more emotional. I remember driving to the hospital, and seeing him laying in that bed, white as a ghost. It broke my heart, but I tried hard holding my emotions in. I new then that he was in heaven looking down on us, in peace!!!



Grandaddy,
I miss you more than anything in this world! I am crying to you as I write this because I miss you & love you. There's not a moment that doesn't go by that I don't think of you. My life here on earth has been great. Wayne & I have been very blessed, and are so happy together. We've raised quit a handsome baby boy. You never would have thought your toota-bug would grow up to be such a loving wife & mother, eh? :) Really, I couldn't be happier . I know that you have watched Hunter grow older as these months have passed. I would love for him to have met you while you were here, but I know there will come a day & time again for you to meet. We gave him my nickname [toota bug] that you used to call me, just to keep you in our daily lives to remember. I'm still going to church & serving God. There are days where I fill like giving up, but I know that's just satan trying to win me over. I know God's watching me, & I do my best daily. Granny is doing fine, she is still staying strong, & does as much as she can around the house. You know how she is, she never sits down, got to keep moving. She's re-modeled the house [a lot]. You probably would have liked it, except for the part during the whole remodeling work. I could here ya now complaining to Granny :) Your other baby, toota bug {penny}, lives with Dad now, and is probably wishing you could have taken her with you to heaven. :) Everyone else is doing ok. There has been a few down falls in some of our lives since you've passed, but praying that things are going to get better.

Jamie, Hunter, & I visited your grave site on Saturday. We didn't stay long as you can see, the sun was very hot. You have pretty blue flowers on your grave, [you probably would tell Granny you didn't need them darn things], there's also 2 squirrel antiques on there too. I guess there suppose to resemble you & granny. On accident, Hunter broke one of them. I'm sure you saw that. :) We did pull up some weeds around your stone, and made it look a bit better. I wished you Happy Fathers Day, hoping that you heard me. I would like to have stayed longer to talk to you but that was a bit difficult with a 10 month.
I do want you to know that I will see you again one day. I love you & take care. Tell everyone in heaven we love them too and miss them.
Love always,
Toota-bug

Here's a song that was requested at my granddad's funeral that a lot of people probably ask God this; Why Me Lord............. just listen to the words.......